Back in the 1970’s, at the time Relief Society dues were dropped and the church consolidated its schedule, all women became instant members into the Relief Society upon baptism into the LDS Church.  Before then, paid dues identified the choice each sister made as she accepted the responsibilities and opportunities a member of the Relief Society enjoyed.  Also back then, every sister eagerly paid her dues and even many non-member sisters paid knowing it was a beneficial program she was involving herself in.

Times have changed.  With the new schedule women were required to double up on their responsibilities.  As a member of the Relief Society, a sister would, on occasion, have to miss her Sunday meeting if she had a calling in the Primary or Young Women.  Over the years it has been interesting to see the reaction of this sacrifice made by various sisters.  Many sisters don’t seem to mind.  They enjoy their calling and don’t really miss Relief Society.  Other sisters become a little bitter if they are “stuck” in a calling that takes them away from their Relief Society.  But there is more to just Sunday meetings, and having a calling in another auxiliary does not exempt you.

Age is apparently a large factor in the Relief Society structure.  Old women are either quitting (saying they have already done enough), or feeling left out, because no one seems to need them anymore.  And on a similar ground, young women are not interested, because they love the Young Women too much to leave it, they believe Relief Society is for old fogies, or they tend to take over, thinking the younger generation needs to let the older generation off the hook.  Whatever happened to pooling our intelligence together?  Why aren’t the older sisters coaching and befriending the younger sisters?  And why aren’t the younger sisters recognizing that Young Women’s is a preparation for Relief Society-which is the true goal, the ultimate sisterhood.   

Boyd K. Packer said, “You must graduate from thinking that you only attend Relief Society to feeling that you belong to it!” When something is a part of your life, you make time for it, you believe in it and it is an important identity to your persona.  In 1973, the youngest member of the Relief Society General Board was twenty-one year old Kristin Theurer.  She said, “It’s silly to talk about a generation gap in the gospel, because, basically, we’re all working for the same end—eternal life.” (Taken from Women of Covenant)

In what ways should we be looking at this challenge?  How do we demonstrate love and acceptance to incoming sisters-YW, new move-ins, visitors, anyone?  How does a mother relate to her own daughters?  As the daughters grow, there is a point of companionship and equality, and even when daughters need to step in to hold up and support their mothers, there is love, respect and admiration.  What good is arriving at the goal if we go separately?  It’s so much more fun and gratifying working together, using one another’s skills, and enjoying one another’s unique personalities.