Are there any good manners left in our society? What happened to Thank You notes, RSVPs, sincere apologies? Is the customer ever right, anymore? Is graciousness old fashioned? Do our young people know how to conduct themselves in a formal situation?
Emmeline B. Wells wrote an article in the Women’s Exponent lamenting this very topic (Jan 1879). She added a list of impolite things to watch for as well. Think about your own philosophy and experience. Enjoy!
THE MANNERS OF THE AGES
Mothers, teachers, editors, writers can all materially aid in improving the manners of the age. Fathers are not exempt either, but as a mother’s influence on the mind and the character of a child is almost always greater than that of the father, so it would be in the case of manners and good breeding. Women tolerate and sanction too many rudenesses on the part of men. Before these improprieties and liberties can be remedied somebody must strongly and emphatically declare themselves against them, and set their faces like iron to do battle for a higher state of society and its usages.
A LIST OF IMPOLITE THINGS
- Loud and boisterous laughing
- Reading when others are talking or visa versa
- Cutting fingernails in company
- Leaving a stranger without a seat
- Spitting about the house, smoking or chewing
- Leaving church before worship is closed
- Whispering or laughing in the house of God
- Correcting older persons than yourself, especially your parents
- Not listening to what one is saying in company
- Commencing to eat upon reaching the table
- Answering questions put to someone else
- Commencing talking before others have finished speaking
- Laughing at the mistakes of others
- Receiving a present without an expression of gratitude
- Not greeting someone you pass along the way
It’s true, that this falls under the realm of mothering and training. Where everyone is responsible to set a good example, it is the mother who sets the standard. We live in a casual society. When mothers became occupied with other interests and necessities, the training lost its importance and society has suffered as a result. It’s an uncomfortable thing to say, but mothers have dropped the ball. Instead of women supporting one another during the tough times, we have all relaxed our standards and life now is hard for everyone. However, I believe it is never too late. Sisters can band together, regroup, raise the bar. And with great patience, love, and support we can pull back the reins and teach and train as the Lord himself taught.