So many casual marriages, so many petty divorces. I’ve heard too many instances where irreconcilable differences is the excuse of the day. I recently heard, once again, a man lamenting his recent divorce. He and his wife still get along for the sake of the children, but they themselves cannot live with one another anymore. What could possibly be the reason? Miscommunication that cut and destroyed their love.

The husband wants to support his family. He knows that is his job. He works hard, he is responsible. But when the job demands most of his time, what is he to do? When his wife feels neglected, she builds a wall around her to protect herself from the hurt she feels. His job has replaced his home and his family.

This is a common scenario. Why do we let it continue and do so much damage to two worthy people?

And what of the children? After divorce, the father carves out time to spend with his child, since he rarely sees him/her anymore. He does it because he loves her and wants her to remember him. But what of the wife? If the husband can carve out time for his son/daughter, why didn’t he think to do that in the first place for his wife? Oh, what a tangled web we weave.

Communicate with one another. Be willing to talk about your hurts, your expectations, and your feelings. And this part is even more important: Be willing to listen, even when it hurts to, even when you can’t fix it easily, even when there is sobbing involved. If you do these two things, you will save your marriage. If you can do these two things, you can work toward solving the problems that come up. Your love will survive the difficulties and you will grow strong together.

Protect your love. Don’t settle for friendship after the divorce. Communicate and compromise, allowing for love to grow. Practice now the life of an eternal marriage.