I’m guessing that most of you are familiar with the movie “The Blind Side”.  Great movie, great message.  I was so intrigued with the Sean and Leigh Anne Tuohy (Too-wee) family I decided to read their book “In a Heartbeat”, to find out what kind of people they really were.

I learned that the story depicted in the movie was not their one and only gift to the world.  This family practices charity every day of their lives.  They have “saved” more than one young man.  They have reached out to help others, and they have influenced countless others to do the same.

The Tuohy’s call what they do the Popcorn Theory:  “You can’t help everyone.  But you can try to help the hot ones who pop right up in front of your face.  The Popcorn Theory is about noticing others.”  They believe in being a cheerful giver.  Life, to them, is a test to prove what they can do.

“That was why [God] gave us our problems, pleasures, assets, and deficits.  It was why He made people black, white, Latino, and Asian; why people were wealthy, poor, and middle class.  It was all part of the Big Test, and one of the questions on the test was, ‘What do you do with difference?’  God gave us problems to see how we would handle them.  and He gave us difference to see if we could learn to live with one another.”

When I read that, I decided I could learn something from these people.

Sandra Bullock (the actress who played Leigh Anne Tuohy) was concerned about meeting this family, because she is wary of people who wave their religion like a banner in the air.  Her reaction to those people is, “I might not go to church every day, but I know I try to do the right thing, whereas you’re going to church and you’re still sleeping around on your wife and spending everybody else’s money.  How are you better than I am?”  She discovered the Tuohy’s weren’t “those people”, but they actually talked the talk, and walked the walk.

Here is a short list of some of the examples I picked up from this good, and decent, family.

1. Having dinner with a friend, who was a high school teacher, Leigh Anne learned that eight of the kids in her class couldn’t afford their annual physicals.  “Impulsively, Leigh Anne blurted out, ‘We’ll pay for it.’”  This opportunity came up before the Tuohys became wealthy (as we saw in the movie).  In fact, the teacher friend said, “You’ll pay? I’m helping you pay your bills! How are you going to pay for it?”  Leigh Anne remembers, “Somehow we found a way to foot the bill, and it wasn’t too painful.”  a) I love that she acted impulsively, b) I love that it wasn’t convenient, c) I love that it wasn’t too painful, and actually made her feel like doing it again…which she did.
2. Sean Tuohy feels just as strongly as Leigh Anne about giving.  He said, “I just give what feels good.”  One of their favorite sayings is, “To whom much is given, much is required.”  As the business became more successful, Leigh Anne says they began thinking more formally about giving and how to do it most powerfully.  a) I love that they felt the same way about giving, b) I love that they wanted to give–powerfully–.
3. The Tuohys didn’t want their children to enjoy their wealth too much, so they adopted a “Get One, Give One” philosophy.  “When we got something, we had to give something.”
4. They made it a habit to look for causes.  They supplied inner city school basketball teams with new sneakers or uniforms, they sponsored trips to summer youth camps, they volunteered for the Big Brother program, they mentored underprivileged children.  a) I love that they provided opportunity for their children to volunteer, and helped them stick with it.
5. Sean volunteered to coach the basketball team at school.  This is what started the family inviting players to their home to hang out, eat, and even sleep over.  They purposely bought a home close to the school, so they could provide this service.

At one point, the family almost went bankrupt.  The economy took a dive, and fast food places began popping up everywhere, all which affected their income greatly.  Leigh Anne commented, “But a crisis, if you survive it, can be a healthy thing.  It forces you to check yourself; it reminds you that with too much comfort, rot can set in.  It reduces you to basics, to what’s really important in your life.”  They both realized their children were healthy and happy, and their marriage was strong.  They could survive this.  “For a while, the financial pressures meant that we had to curb our spending and we couldn’t give as freely as we had.  But we still had plenty to give, we realized, both tangibly and intangibly.”

Can the sisters of the Relief Society, whose motto is “Charity Never Faileth” do any less?  We can all stretch more, reach out farther, extend ourselves again, and serve as the Master showed us.