I found a great article with loads of good strategies for Relief Society presidents. Four women, on a panel, shared some of their experiences while serving. I happily share some of their great thoughts and suggestions.
Maureen Ursenbach Beecher is one of our Mormon Women historians. She knew a lot about our early sisters, and their accomplishments before she was ever called as a president; so, as she served, she used some of that knowledge to find her direction.
She explains: When Joseph Smith organized the women, his instruction was that the Society operate according to precedent and present circumstance. Women knew how to get along and organize themselves so Joseph was assuring them to proceed as typically they might. He also counseled them to have a “living constitution” which would allow flexibility to make appropriate modifications whenever necessary.
Elder Boyd K. Packer warned us in a 1984 address, “There is a temptation to try to solve problems by changing boundaries, altering programs or reorganizing the leadership.” He added, “There is a spiritual ingredient not found in the handbooks that you must include in your ministry if you are to please the Lord.”
Another successful discovery, “I have become shameless in my demands for sacrifice from our women.” She found this to be the key to involving everyone. Working together, discussing individual needs, finding many solutions, they spread many handfuls of love. And by instituting the bearing of testimonies, and sharing their experiences, they became a unified sisterhood.
She suggested making a study of those who do not attend Relief Society. Find out what is keeping them away. Find ways for everyone to bond. Reach out to those serving in Young Women and Primary.
She found that divorced, single parents are in the most overwhelming position. These sisters are the ones who need a break. She instituted a discussion group where they could get together and just talk. It was very successful. As well, she involved them as much as possible. Envision Relief Society as Joseph Smith did: “yoked together with priesthood quorums in the service of all.” The challenge is to pull the whole ward together by strengthening Home and Visiting Teaching.
One final thing to remember, “I cannot correct every ill, or even enrich every life.”
Cathy Stokes was a RS president in Chicago. She said too many women are willing to struggle on their own, when if they could trust the “Circle of Sisterhood” they could be carried instead. Strength comes in knowing the abilities and weaknesses of each woman. She quotes an old Negro Spiritual that says, “Plenty Good Room”. There is plenty good room for every sister who wants to be in the circle.
The Visiting Teaching Coordinator needs to be a strong, faithful Visiting Teacher, so she can set the example and organize well the variety of experienced and new sisters. This woman needs to fearlessly mesh sisters together that may not ordinarily seek friendship, yet with the Lord’s help, do invaluable, compassionate work.
Being in a student ward, there were several move-ins each semester. Instead of visiting each of the new sisters, she invited them over for dinner, as many as she could fit around her table.
Her mantra was LOVE-LEARN-SERVE. If you’re not sure how to start, just start serving them, then you will love them. From there you will bond, and that’s when the magic of the gospel rests upon everyone. The more we learn about the gospel (Jesus Christ), the quality and quantity of our service will increase.
Also talking about Visiting Teaching, Cathy suggests each teacher take the time to ask her sister what she thinks; what the message means to her. Sisters will discover interesting things about one another that will bond them together.
Relief Society should help us with balancing our lives. Whatever service we are called upon to render, whatever sacrifice we are asked to make, if we go forth with power and love we can fulfill our calling as Woman.
K. Carpenter served as a Stake Relief Society president in Chicago. She asks this question: Do we ever look at Relief Society with a clear clean vision? Or do we get bogged down in the mire? How many of us go to Relief Society looking for that pat on the back for service well done? As we look at the good people in our neighborhood, as they enrich the community without fanfare, maybe we should pitch our hoes in a little deeper. Sometimes Relief Society becomes ho hum and stagnant. Looking with fresh eyes will motivate us anew. It is just as much our responsibility to inspire and lead out.
Sharon Swenson was the final president. She feels a Relief Society president stands as a medium to channel the Lord’s love to each of his daughters. That’s a lot of pressure on the President, yet with the Lord’s help, all are lifted up and blessed. Let yourself be guided and directed by the Lord. The Lord’s inspiration operates with a lot more knowledge than you have.
Ask your sisters what kind of Relief Society they want? What do they want it to be? What do they want to do for it? The program is made for us—not us for the program. We should be creating groups that work for our ward situation.
“How Do You Spell Relief? A Panel of Relief Society Presidents”, from Dialogue: a Journal of Mormon Thought, Dec 1, 1988
“Principles”, Boyd K. Packer, Ensign, Mar 1985