So, why do so many sisters feel a disconnect from one another in their wards? What is the secret that makes sisters feel so close to one another?

I don’t know all of the answers. I do know that I have that disconnect feeling. I haven’t been visit taught on any kind of regular basis for four years. And my calling is such that I don’t often mingle with ward members. Are Sunday meetings and  once-a-month meetings enough?

Pres. Boyd K. Packer has said that Relief Society is not just a Sunday class here. Yet, in many wards that’s the only consistent gathering provided. If a sister doesn’t go to the monthly meeting, all she has is the Sunday meeting. If she feels disconnected, she may forgo that meeting; or possibly feel relieved to work in another organization. If her visiting teachers don’t come regularly, what else is there that could draw her to love Relief Society?

According to the new guidelines,given to us in 2009, the General Board appears to be trying to help us look at our wards differently. Instead of getting our instruction from some manual, where we must all do it the same way, they are teaching us to look at the needs of our wards, consult the Bishop, pray to know our sisters, and provide appropriate meetings to fill those needs.

Some wards consist of five sisters. These sisters may want to meet often, or they may live so far from one another that meeting once a month still makes them feel close to one another without adding any burden to their lives.

Another ward may be in a neighborhood, where various sisters have like interests and time on their hands. Several different small groups may enjoy getting together for various small projects on a fairly regular schedule. These small groups may be able to reschedule whenever necessary to involve less active sisters, to draw them out, and help them feel a part of things.

If your ward has average Sunday attendance and low to average monthly meeting attendance, then you need to open the door for small groups. Let the sisters know that their interests are valued, and that their interests can strengthen Relief Society sisters around them. Work up some kind of system where like-minded sisters can come together. Your objective is to create a sisterly atmosphere amongst ALL of your sisters; not just the sisters who actively come to everything anyway.

Widen your margins; invite, urge, and inspire; offer direction—but only when needed—sisters are pretty sharp and capable. Anyone should be able to start a group; a president never has to feel that she has to control everything. Think how many sisters would be involved if you had ten groups (with ten people each who attended at least half the time) meeting regularly each month. Do you have one hundred sisters engaged in your monthly meeting? What if these sisters actually fulfilled some project or goal while meeting with these like-minded sisters? Do the sisters that meet monthly fulfill goals and projects?

Smaller groups often connect faster than larger groups. Not everyone can make it to every meeting. Small groups remain flexible so more sisters are able to come and go, get involved remotely, not feel any pressure, be missed and noticed, and still feel connected to that small group of sisters.

Give it a try. Let your sisters verbalize their desired groups. Or offer some obvious classes such as temple work, family care, service, scripture study, etc. Find out better ways to connect your sisters together.